I was very upset to learn that the 100-year-old egg contestants ate tonight on Fear Factor wasn't really 100 years old, just old enough so that the "yolk turns into a horrible green mold and the white becomes a dark brown gel with an alkaline taste." Where is the integrity anymore, I ask you.

What in the he-ell is Billy Bob Thornton doing at the Fillmore? And do you think Angelina will be there? Maybe we should revive our Halloween costumes and go check it out.

Ah, the Amazing Race video is done! All awards, accolades, and prize money should be directed to my new hero, who is blessed with both patience and skill. And many name spellings.